I hear you cry out from the wilderness:
“Dear God, I write to You during February, the month of St. Valentine’s Day. God, do You give us Life on Earth so that we will experience becoming attached? A hazard of Life is that we hold on tight. And then You sprinkle death around so that we will learn not to become attached but rather to free ourselves from attachment.
“In all due respects, God, this is like a trick, and the joke is on us. St. Valentine’s Day came and went and left so many of us high and dry. Our hope is so great we fall for it every time.
“Certainly, You want us to Love, and we want to Love, yet in this world, we seem to only know how to grab on even when the grabbing on is on the mental plane.
“And, then, when our loved ones leave for one adventure or another, our whole foundation seems to shatter and scatter. We are adrift until it seems we build a certain crust or scab on our hearts. We try to make our hearts more stern, more above it all. The despair we find ourselves lost in is too painful to bear ever again. Alas, to be vulnerable to Love and not find Love again.
“We understand very well that there are no replacements for our deeply-loved ones. If we are lucky, we have a father and mother on Earth. Yet one way or another, they leave, and we are left behind, or we leave, and they are left behind.
“There can be other Hearts we Love, yet never others quite like the ones who have gone onto greener pastures.
“It seems, dear God, that to Love with all our hearts means that the Ultimate Destination of Loving is the sense of loss.
“And, yet, even when we are strong enough to allow our hearts full freedom now, Love is not always so easy to come by. We don’t always find Love waiting on the corner for us. We accept that our Deeply Loved Ones are irreplaceable, yet sometimes we don’t meet anyone to love again, or, despite our own wishes, our range of Loving comes to a standstill, and there is no object or subject of Love for us again.
“Granted, God, You are Love and always loving us, still we – I — yearn for a special human Being to love again. All dreams do not come true. It’s like I wait for a ship that never comes in. April Fools’ Day stars in my Life.
“Trying to Love doesn’t work. Or, I don’t know how to begin. Truly, I don’t want Love for the idea of it, but for the Truth of it. God, I have come nowhere near.
“You have said that our Love will arrive like the Lighting Dawn. I wait for the Dawn. I understand that my Life does not depend on this, nevertheless. I feel adrift. I feel that I am not Love, and will never again Love with All My Heart.”
Ah, beloved Child, Beloved Children, you still have Life. Life Itself isn’t nothing. It could be true that you have had your last Big Love. You may not find a Great New Personal Love again, yet still you have Life, and Life is before you, and you can Love whatever lies before you. A personal Love isn’t everything. Even if you have a New Love, a New Love may well not be enough to take away the various urgings in your heart. When all is said and done, a sense of indwelling loneliness may still follow you no matter what.
It is clear now that you must love yourself. How about loving yourself as you are in this moment of fictitious time? In Truth, there is no time, so it cannot be true that time runs out. Love is True, and that’s it.
Just Love the Day Before You. Despite your convictions, there is no telling what tomorrow brings.